herroyaldarkness:

Maleficent was unlike anything she’d ever seen. She was different from how things were with Jefferson, in more than just the obvious ways. She was mesmerizing and terrifying in ways Regina had never known to desire. It was if Maleficent’s very gaze could sear her from the inside out, and suddenly her own inability to summon a meager fireball seemed trivial at best. 

The kiss she was given next felt no less intoxicating than the last, its wrongness now some sort of drug she was fast becoming addicted to. Were she of a more clear mind she might ask herself why every relationship she was in had to be kept secret, but perhaps that was simply part of the thrill. If it were in the open it would be too easy, and if there was anything Regina had never enjoyed, it was being bored. Her life had always been nothing short of routine. Regulation. Rules. Expectations. Defying them was the only power she’d ever known, and it would seem that habit was dying hard, even with a greater power now within her grasp. 

A succession of small gasps and soft sighs left Regina as Maleficent traversed her way down her body with kisses, each burning hotter than the last. Her words only acted as fuel to the flames, making Regina’s skin prickle and crawl with desire. Her heart thundered with nervous anticipation, and a crippling desire not to disappoint this woman who was, for lack of better word, a near idol. To go from having read her spellbook from cover to cover countless times to…. this. She had no words, and whatever words she might’ve had were stolen by the woman’s touch.

When Maleficent sat up, Regina groaned, disappointedly. Her brow furrowed in a small wrinkle, but soon the confusion wore off, leaving her only to smile timidly at the request. Normally, when she was in this situation, Jefferson saw to this particular step in the process, but she was determined to prove herself. Determined not hear this woman bidding her to leave one more time. And so, with a deep breath, and eyes glued to Maleficent’s, Regina slowly sat up beneath her, shaking hands raising to slowly finish unlacing her corset. 

Setting the leather aside, she allowed her gaze to down cast as she then began unlacing the dress itself. It was thin, light and not nearly so cumbersome as a gown she might wear to court, and its fabric slipped easily down her shoulders as it was loosened. Her arms both rose, pressing to her chest to keep it from falling all the way, as her cheeks tinged pink. 

“You’re shy.” The words came out on the cusp of a gentle laugh, with a softness to her tone that even in stating the obvious didn’t waiver. What was this girl doing to her? Or more accurately, what was she allowing her to do? Soft was not her normal approach. Gentle and kind were not words she would ever use to describe herself, nor that she would try to project. But something in the warm gaze that met her own ice cold persuaded her to try other degrees and intimacy.

“You shouldn’t be.” With that she leaned back in, placing a full and heavy kiss against Regina’s lips, her dress having fallen into a dense heap on the floor, kicked away with little care. She wore only her thin underclothes then, silk trimmed with intricate lace, bindings wedged in various parts, to accentuate how slight her waist was, and the fullness of her chest above it, designs of her own construction as she often found more common wears to be utterly lacking. There was an image she’d once put forth, deceptive beauty to trick whoever she saw fit into a state of trust, so that when she revealed just what she was it was all the more terrifying. There are few things more frightening than a beautiful face turning into your worst nightmare. It was an ode she had lived by quite ardently. But that was all in the past now.

“Relax,” she said in a faint whisper, in the smallest break between their kiss, where she stayed close enough that it was spoken right against her petal soft lips. Her hands clutched softly at Regina’s, feeling the faint tremble there and smiling just slightly against her. It seemed there was still one person she could both impress and terrify, and though harm was not her goal at all for the girl, it was still quite satisfying to see she still held some of the same effect she once had. And when she gently pulled Regina’s hands away from herself, setting them against the bed to either side of her, harm was still not her intent.

She finished the tugging the remains of her dress’ ties, pulling the fabric up in bunches until she’d forced it over her hips, still pulling up until she would lift her arms to help rid her of it entirely. Maleficent’s gaze stayed locked on her, not in challenge but a sort of reassurance. Reassurance that despite how she rushed things, there was something real brewing beneath the surface, that she may have told her quite decisively that she had no interest in her heart, but there was still more than enough of her that she was more than interested in.

herroyaldarkness:

Regina’s breath caught when her back met the plush feathery embrace of Maleficent’s mattress. Sinking in deeply, but focused only on the woman hovering just above her, she parted swollen lips for a much needed drink of air. Her eyes were already glazed over, hazed by lust and ecstasy, but she did not let them stray from Maleficent. Her chest heaved in languishing but steady motions, trying desperately to calm her racing heart down to something less deafening. When Maleficent traced her thumb down from Regina’s lips to her chest, her eyes fluttered shut, a sharper gasp being taken when lips joined the taunting caress.

At the question, only a protesting groan left the young queen, body aching beneath every kiss and touch. She was not in the mood to be teased, in any measure of the word, yet thought proved itself difficult the more warm kisses were laid against the tender flesh of her throat. The kisses kept her from answering, and when they grew hotter, a gasp was drawn forth, sharp and sudden, followed by a low moan. “Yes – “ she exhaled at last, voice wavering with tremulous anticipation. She did trust Maleficent, at least to an extent. Perhaps it was foolish to trust her implicitly, but in the moment she saw nothing worth fearing enough to put an end to this intimacy.

A hesitant hand moved from where it had laid next to her, finding it’s way to Maleficent’s side, fingers curling inward to dig into the fabric of her dress. She wasn’t certain she was ready for this, or even what all this would entail. She’d never been with a woman, nor had she considered it. And most everything she did know came from Jefferson’s… voracious appetite for carnalities. Swallowing back against her apprehension, Regina’s eyes opened once more, hoping to find Maleficent’s and some reassurance within them. 

A hint of a smile began to form on her lips, one that managed to reach her eyes as they stared down into the wide brown gaze below. So much innocence could seen there, more than she knew Regina would ever wish to admit to, but she saw it. Just behind her eyes there was a timidness, she watched as it dictated each move she made, and how it regressed like a tide when her hand clutched at Maleficent’s hip, and that made the smile turn more into a smirk. “You should —” she sounded certain, wholly honest in her words, almost like a warning. She should trust her, but she should also brace herself. There was no telling just what might be unleashed after so long.

Humming again she took a single kiss from Regina’s lips. Took it for her own. A deep and wet connection of lips and tongue, before she was bracing her hands against the bed and slowly moving down, her lips dropping to the first bit of flesh they could, just above her collarbone where she left a searing kiss, and then just between her breasts, as much as her undone top would allow.

“There was a time when I was rather good at this,” she spoke lightly, in some sort of reverent memory, though not as if it were something she no longer believed herself capable of. Quite the opposite in fact. She was entirely certain it would take very little to fall back into it like no time had passed at all.

“And I pick back up fast.” A smile could be heard in her tone, as she sunk low enough to kiss at Regina’s navel, the heat of dragon’s fire ensuring it was felt even through the fabric still covering her. But then she was sitting up, reaching for the ties of her own corset, and looking expectantly at the girl beneath her, that she might see to some of her clothing too.

“Can you see to the rest of that yourself?”

herroyaldarkness:

Regina stumbled, feet forgetting their purpose the longer she was kissed. Moans left her unbidden, ripped from deep inside her by Maleficent’s touch. Her heart continued to thunder the further they progressed, her hands clawing and gripping tight to keep her from toppling over from shaking knees. She hadn’t felt this brand of anxious thrill since Jefferson insisted they be together with the king just feet beyond her chamber doors. She had always found something exciting about doing what was wrong, and the risk of being caught – but this was much different. This was not just a betrayal of what she had declared moral. This was danger. This was her putting herself in the taloned grasp of a dragon, and asking it to devour her. 

When she ripped her lips from Maleficent’s, swollen and parted as she drank desperately of the stale air around them, her eyes fluttered open, finally fully registering the warmth of the hand at her cheek. Her eyes widened, seeking out an answer within the the deepest shades of blue reflected in Maleficent’s own gaze. Her chest heaved in slow, languid rises and falls, air somehow more difficult to swallow for how rapidly her pulse raced. No words seemed appropriate, though she felt as though something ought to be said. Yet, the longer she stared, the heavier the silence weighed, and the more her aching lips begged to be reunited with those of the woman before her. And without further thought, her eyes slowly fell shut once more, the arm at Maleficent’s shoulder pulling tightly until Regina was on her toes, pressing another, much more earnest kiss against the woman’s lips.

It took only a small push once they’d reached the edge of the bed, to send them tumbling, Regina landing first and Maleficent catching herself just above her, the slightest touch of wickedness in her eyes. Her gaze dragged down from Regina’s own, surveying all that laid before her. Pressing the pad of her thumb to the girl’s lip, she traced a path straight down, against her throat and onward until it swept across her chest, then let the touch slowly die off entirely. There was an almost artful way in which she approached this, even when it was rough and nothing but teeth she treated it like something to be remembered. She made certain that every man and every woman she’d ever touched would remember it until their dying days. Even when it came sooner for some.

“Do you trust me?” She finally broke the silence that had fallen between them, asking in her most put upon innocent tone, as she bent enough to lay a kiss beneath her jaw, a hand coming up to angle her the way she wanted, and another kiss was laid just below the first. She was fairly certain she knew the answer, but there was something to be said for making it difficult for her to voice it. At the third kiss a little magic was employed, warming her lips as they descended on soft skin. It wasn’t enough to burn by any means, only meant to draw her focus, making certain that she was fully paying attention to just who and what hovered above her.

A heated exhale came out against the column of her neck, followed by a hum as she moved to catch her gaze again, waiting for both her answer and what reaction she might pull from the hand already beginning to tug at the little leather string on Regina’s top.

herroyaldarkness:

The kiss took her breath away, a sharply inhaled gasp slicing its way through the silence that had hung between them since her words fell ominously. The gesture was rough. Pain mingled with searing pleasure as her hands moved, raising suddenly to press to Maleficent’s chest for balance and support against the impassioned embrace. Her eyes closed as her heart pounded in her chest, racing with adrenaline, a whimper escaping before she began to return the kiss as best she could. Her fingers curled inward, digging into the fabric of Maleficent’s gown, brow furrowing the more her raging emotions intensified. There was plenty about this that was wrong. but for once in her life she didn’t care any longer. There was no small voice whispering to her from a distance, keeping her grounded in what goodness still clung to her heart. Goodness had won her only pain. Whatever this was, it felt good. And she wanted more.

When their lips parted briefly, Regina too opened her eyes, cheeks bright red and lips parted in a swollen gape. Maleficent was like nothing she had ever known, and likely there was nothing else to know that could compare. What was moments seemed to beat on in her mind for an eternity, staring into the eyes of such power and danger. Seeing it look back at her as something to desire. Something of worth. Any words that had hope of coming to life died when their lips met again, and her eyes closed tightly against the outside world. Her hands at Maleficent’s chest moved slowly and with trepidation, each sliding an opposing  course; one upwards and over a shoulder, tho other down and slipping behind Maleficent’s back, pulling tight until their bodies pressed closely together.

The kiss itself was different than any they had shared before. More raw, and intimate. Regina willingly, eagerly parted her lips. Bidding Maleficent entrance should she desire it. After all, there was hardly any use in doing something half way. No more than there was a means to go back once a line had been crossed. She had given this woman the offering of herself. Laid herself before the beast, a willing victim to the flame. And if she were thusly consumed, then so be it.

Words grew more and more unimportant with every moment that ticked by. Speaking would add nothing to the experience, not when it could just as easily threaten its very stability altogether. Regina had made her point clear, but she was a girl with her heart more than involved with another, and it was all too likely time spent talking would only leave room to remind her of it. Maleficent may have intended to leave the girl to her fate, but now they were here and she would be damned if anything stopped her now.

She kissed with purpose, lips and teeth clashing, but soon it became something so much more instinctual. Soft, almost, deep and unhurried, as she took and tasted everything Regina offered. There was no thought or plan, no clear destination to drag her to, not yet, there was only a kiss and a fire that roared violently to life, seen even in her fireplace as the flames intensified, changing in color and shape until they raged just as hard as the ones in her chest.

At once her grip on Regina’s hip tightened, as she turned them half a spin, beginning to push her backward toward the great hall just behind them. She clutched hard at the fabric, nails digging in to tough leather, while the other cradled her face, equally as gentle there as she was rough below. Her thumb brushed against the soft skin of Regina’s cheek, in a single delicate sweep, as she took in a breath but left her eyes closed, ending it with another kiss, even softer than the one before.

It was easier as she settled in to the familiar burn a kiss could ignite. Easier to be intimate, and less like a feral beast only just unchained. She had no desire to tear the girl in two, not like this, at least. That could be accomplished through much more pleasant means once they moved somewhere a touch more accommodating.

herroyaldarkness:

“I am not asking for compromise. I am asking for mercy. Don’t send me back to that prison. Don’t ask me to leave you…  I don’t want to be alone anymore. I can’t be. I keep — waiting. Waiting for everything I am supposed to have. Everything that is supposed to make me happy and it isn’t happening.” 

Emotion crippled her voice, hot angry tears streaking her face as a tremble kept her words sounding desperate. Moving six quick steps closer to Maleficent, stopping just before her, unsure of what propelled here there, Regina shook her head. She loved Jefferson. She loved him so much that even considering this made her feel a stab of guilt — but something echoed in her mind. A voice not her own, though it sounded strangely familiar. If he loved me, he would be here. She’d asked him countless times to stay at her side, and he never had. Now she stood begging Maleficent not to send her away. 

“I am tired of being moral.” She ground out, each syllable making the unbearable frustration she had been shouldering evident. “If you want something of me, Maleficent, then take it.”

It started like an itch, just at the base of her spine. A prickling that ascended upward inch by inch until the very hair on the back of her neck stood up. Her jaw stayed set hard in place, but her eyes, her eyes began to betray her. They softened. Her brow unknitting from its deep scowl. And slowly, the rest of her followed suit. It was barely noticeable at first; a fist unclenching, lips parting just enough to draw in a small drink of air, jaw and shoulders slacked, all with every subsequent word that tumbled out from the girl’s lips and every tear that littered her cheeks.

Maleficent had never been a proponent of tearful displays. Normally they ended in screams and shrieks, deafening sounds and then deafness altogether. But then it had been longer than she could at all remember since she’d cared for the one who was crying. Since she’d cared for a single soul at all. And why should she have? What had they ever done for her? What had they ever made her feel? Regina should have been one of many, but somehow, she was something entirely different.

Stiffening when she propelled closer, Maleficent’s gaze grew defensive, but there was no attack to ward off. She stared at her, a gnawing feeling setting in her gut, waiting for the next brick to fall. She was already expecting to be worn down, for Regina’s pleas to do exactly what she hoped, and have her given permission to stay, but something happened that even Maleficent didn’t expect. With her final words cast into the small space between them, weighty and vexing, everything turned on its end. Her body seemed to make the decision first, stepping forward just before her mind caught up and added another step.

It was sudden and swift — a hand at the back of her neck, cradling, a breath cut off before she could take it. Her words echoed, loud, over and over and over, if you want something then take it, and take she did. The kiss was rough and thorough. She clutched at Regina’s waist to ensure she didn’t fall over from the pressure of it, which was more than enough to bruise. But Maleficent didn’t care. She’d been pushed into a box where she did not fit. Wings shoved in and bending this way and that to accommodate her stature. She was not the gentle type. Not the kind, caring person like Regina was, and she’d never wanted to be. Fire flowed through her veins even more than blood did, and it left her hot and parched and burning with emotion, with no outlet for so, so long.

Regina had unleashed a beast at her behest, and that beast had tried to be gentle with her. But it wasn’t what the beast was. It was ravenous, deprived of contact for longer than most could survive, trying to live on scraps and only growing angrier at her own willingness to agree to it. Where her words had failed before, now Regina’s voice broke through something deep inside, something she’d forced down dormant, kept from the light, the fire, the heat, and finally, finally released. Their lips parted only long enough to take in a short breath of air, her eyes opening and then closing in a fluttering blink. She was so tired of talking. Explaining. There was nothing else she wished to say. The second kiss was soft at its start, but it soon grew just as desperate and deep as the first had been. There was still so much more she wanted, that all laid behind those lips.

herroyaldarkness:

Maleficent pausing made Regina’s heart constrict with a single thud of hope. Her lips parted, though her throat had run dry and she fought every raging emotion within her to find the right words. If this was her last chance she had to make it count. Yet so much good intent did her little good as her heart once more drowned out her head. ”Don’t make me go,” she found herself blurting out in hoarse whisper. Vulnerability shone clearly in the way her words cracked, and her eyes plead for mercy, still brimming with tears. “Please,” she added, half a step taken towards the woman, but nothing more was allowed.

A sigh escaped, a laughing one almost. Soft and almost silent, and for herself more than anything else. Was it really that easy? A tearful plea and she would bend and forgive? Turning enough to catch a glimpse of Regina behind her, her gaze stayed wary, suspicious, wondering if this too was some act. One look and Maleficent knew, she was not exactly skilled in hiding her true emotions, and the look on her face made it all too clear that this was a genuine one. The only question was did she still care.

Stepping until she was facing Regina straight on again, her words came out matter-of-factly, but not as sharp as she would have liked. “I haven’t made you do anything,” she said as if they both needed to be reminded. Wasn’t that the whole of this…fight they were in? She hadn’t done anything Regina hadn’t let her do willingly, welcomingly, and she still had no intention to.

“If I let you stay how would this be any different than it just was? I don’t think either of us feel any less legitimate in our feelings than we just did. Why should I compromise for you one more time?”

herroyaldarkness:

“Maleficent…” she called out after her, voice falling quiet and losing all of the boldness she’d managed to muster before. She felt far more defeated than she should have. Felt the spikes of rejection piercing every visible inch of her.  How foolish could she truly be? Maleficent didn’t want her here, much less following her around like a desperate dog in need of affirmation, yet that was all she wished for. Tears she’d willed away returned, brimming in her eyes as she stared after the woman who walked away from her, leaving her alone with herself. The last place she wanted to be. Nothing Maleficent asked of her could have been worse than sending her away. Back to the palace that was little more than a prison. 

She’d made it only a few steps away before she stopped dead in her tracks, the girl’s voice falling into that familiar register, no longer something so purposefully provoking. Her eyes fell shut, a long and deep breath pulled in through her nose, and expelled the same way. She was still putting up with it. Still giving her far too much room to move as she pleased. She could spout words of threat but the threat was still nowhere to be seen. Her hand at her side clenched up again, the other pressed against her stomach as though it could still the rage and roar of fire that demanded freedom. She did not turn, she didn’t face her, but her gaze did fall back, just against her own shoulder, waiting to hear what more she found so important to say.

herroyaldarkness:

A deep breath was drawn in and held as her threats were batted away like flies — harmless and irritating. Did Maleficent really think she had been bluffing? That she would not be happy to die given the chance? Despite her indignation at not being taken seriously, Regina bit back further argument. Instead glowering at Maleficent. Trying to mask the pain with anger. Trying not to appear weak.

“I was not trying to impress you with this.” She spoke, bitterness obvious in how the phrase was given. She’d been desperately trying to impress the woman in many ways since she’d met her, yet this one effort she chose to recognize, the others seemingly void. Didn’t she understand? Regina felt torn in two, and the rip grew wider every day. A love kept waiting for a man who she barely could hold, and something nearly just as strong weeding its way forcefully between every crack of her soul and skin, tendrils outstretching towards the warmth only fire could provide. She wasn’t trying to torment Maleficent any more than she desired to be tormented. She’d put limits on them to begin because she would not betray a love for a lust. But it was different now. There was more than just carnal curiosity for Maleficent brewing beneath her skin.

What tears she had cried dried in wandering tracks down her cheeks as she stared at the woman, arms still tightly crossed around her. “What is it you desire of me, Maleficent?” She asked, voice surprisingly calm for all that she’d just asked for. 

The longer she stood there the harder it got. It had her longing for fresh air, for oblivion. Neither of them were answering or asking the right questions. And she was growing tired of it all. She shook her head at Regina’s next inquiry. What did she desire of her? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not now. Whatever was between them was wearing off. Dusty remnants all that remained. And even that could be sent out with a single, big breath.

“I’d like to be alone, if you don’t mind.” It was the best solution she could think of. End it now or watch it burn. And while the allure Regina had held was becoming only a memory right before her eyes, she still did not wish the girl harm. From herself or any other. “You can see yourself out.”

There was no venom in her words, they were spoken simply and without anger, but not at all implying a mere suggestion. Moving around her chaise, she left Regina to her sitting room to do as she pleased.

herroyaldarkness:

“Is that really how you see me?” Her voice broke with the words, no others able to filter between the cracks of her wounded heart. She did not truly know the depths of her desire or feeling for Maleficent. She did not understand this profoundly confusing attraction; emotional and physical. she only knew how much she felt herself growing to need it. How every moment she could spare was spent journeying here. To be at Maleficent’s side. To seek her company. Her touch. And to think this great sorceress that Regina aspired to as with no other thought her so shallow. So uncaring she would strive to bring the woman to her knees only to feign some interest?

Shaking her head, tears falling silently from her glistening gaze, Regina pulled her arms tighter around herself and looked to the ground. She hadn’t thought a rejection like this would hurt so badly. She hadn’t thought her feelings for the other woman ran deep enough for it. Her teeth grit against the pain, a new sort of friend coming to her, seeping up from the shadowy places of her soul. It filled her nostrils, and bathed her heart in its dark protection, giving her the strength to lift her gaze to the woman, now dark and dower in place of pitiful pain.

“Don’t do me any favors. If compromising for me, and letting me live is such a burden to you — then why don’t you end me? Take that fire you were too apathetic to reclaim on your own and reduce me to ash if that will make you happy.” Even as she spoke, the voice sounded foreign to her. Deeper, darker, and with more grit than what was familiar. Regret tinged the edges of her gaze, but she couldn’t take the words back now. Deep down, some hopeless part of her almost wished Maleficent would do it. At least then she could stop being consumed by all that was just beyond her grasp. Sating her pain. Finding revenge for Daniel. Being happy; Truly happy, for more than one night at a time. All of it seemed a worthwhile reward for the risk of her anger. How could death be any worse than the hell she was already living? Especially if her only friend and respite from the torment of her prison saw her as little more than this.

“Why do you care how I see you? What does it matter?” It was edging just on the side of genuine, the way she asked. How could her opinion mean anything to this girl? Her reverent gazes and constant visits said more than enough why, but she wanted to hear it. She wanted to hear how she could have such an impact. But before she could the other words began to sink in, creeping like vines, but she saw through the charade. She had tried nearly the same tactics after she’d lost her fire, all but begging for death from a man who would not give it. And nor would she give it either.

“It won’t make me happy. Nothing I could let myself do to you would.” She answered far too honestly, a steely cool setting over her while Regina put on her best front. “Do you think you’re impressing me with this sudden reckless behavior of yours? You can’t provoke me into doing anything I wouldn’t want on my own, and you’re doing a pathetic job at trying. Is apathetic the worst thing you’re willing to call me? Put a little more effort in my dear, if you really want to see me angry. Otherwise just stop with the display.”

herroyaldarkness:

Regina truly did not know where she had gone wrong. The ache deep within her was far too deep for what the two of them were meant to be, but she ignored it. Pressed it down and focused on the moment. Reminded herself that she did love another. That he held her heart no matter how infrequently she was able to glimpse his. Yet, Maleficent’s anger and indifference were much more difficult to look past than her own aching chest. 

“You ——— you agreed to it,” she spoke in slow realization, the defense of herself rearing out of a void of fear and hurt faster than she had time to censor it. “You pursued me. Seduced me. Made me desire you, and when I told you what I was… able to give, you agreed.” Shaking her head with a deep, sad frown, she stared at Maleficent with a tearful gleam of treachery in her gaze. She had not earned this.

“I am not trying to hurt you,” she reiterated, her voice cracking through the thick emotion coating every word. “You cannot fault me for my frustration and overlook that you put yourself here just as I did,” she boldly ground out, her chin lifting with all the haughty defiance she possessed, which was anything but inspiring with the tears that welled pathetically in her eyes. “We created this together.” 

“If you think I need reminding of that you’re wrong, I am more than aware of what I agreed to. How I compromised for you. But what I can no longer seem to grasp is why. Why I would. I don’t change for anyone Regina. I don’t take only what I am given, if I want more it is mine. And yet you — you escape my wrath untouched, unburned, I let you.”

It tumbled out quicker than even she realized. More truth. More bile. She couldn’t make it stop. Years of having nothing, no one, made it all too easy to make up for lost time the minute she had an ear to tell it all to. Regina had not earned such grace from her for years spent earning it, no, she simply had it from the start. The day she met her her life was spared, and from then on it had remained so. Some block inside her that stalled her feet, her hands, that left her just out of harm’s way. She couldn’t make sense of it. But it was there. It held her back even now, back from doing something she’d regret.

“You can’t  hurt me.” She said with a certainness only she could boast. Who and what could harm a dragon? Almost nothing this world had to offer. Let alone a young girl. But what that said of the woman, even she did not know.

“We created nothing. As you made certain it had nowhere to go. You can’t fool me by changing your mind once I’ve sunken low enough for you.”